necessary status update

So we're 3 weeks in and its been up and down. At the beginning of this week I was feeling really optimistic because my shoulder was feeling very relaxed. In general, I was having less episodes of pain and my little stretching exercises actually didn't even hurt at all. That was pretty incredible.

But as the week progressed, I realized it wasn't as fabulous as I had thought. I guess it will continue to be a fluctuation throughout this entire process. I am very happy that I experienced the greatness of no pain at the beginning of the week. Its good to remember that it can be that way and is a good reminder that hopefully it will be like that always in the future.

World Cup Games start tomorrow. If anyone finds the games streaming online...let me know!

Scary Dreams

I woke up this morning confused. For the second time I had a dream that really felt real, yet I was doing things I knew I couldn't be doing.

I can't remember the first dream which happened last week, but it was a similar story line to the one I'm about to tell you.

I was with the team (a mix of Stanford and USA) and we were playing in a multi-day, 1 game/day tournament. Every morning we'd go to the practice pool to warm-up, but it was more like my rec swim days at Del Amigo; no goals, skinny lanes, no gutters, and lots of waves. I knew that I was injured so I couldn't play in the games, but I was still getting in and warming up...SWIMMING. (Or trying to at least) One of these morning swims we had to warm-up about 2 hrs before the game started....not sure how this happened, must have been bad scheduling. Anyway, on this day we had to be fast because the game was soon, but I could not get my suit on! Everyone else was in the pool and I just could not get ready in time. So disheartening. Finally I dove in as my teammates were getting out.
Change scene: Adam pulls me over to give me the swim set I should do during the game since I can't play....that's when I get really nervous. It is just NOW that I realize I can't swim, I'm not allowed to swim yet even though I've been getting in the pool all week! ahhhh! So Adam is confused, I'm angry and scared that I ruined my shoulder forever, and then I realize its a dream and wake up.

In the dream I remember saying or thinking, "this is why they tell me I can't get in the pool...its because they know I'll accidentally start doing something I'm not supposed to."

Such dream wisdom.

2 week appt

Updates:

Sleeping on or slightly on my left side....awesome!
Don't have to ice as much as I was....convenient!
Stitches out....freedom!

and...dun dun na naaaaaaaaa

I can SHOWWWAAAAAAAAA

Stood under the rain shower for a super long time and cleansed and cleansed. Hopefully this rash thing on my arm is officially gone!

Driving towards Reality

The last few days have been pretty big for me. We learned that once again my car needed a checkup so I drove mom's car (can't do the manual quite yet) to the shop! It was weird, but i focused and drove really slow and made it there. The car is a bummer, but hopefully this time they will really clean it up and fix the lingering problem.

The next step was cleanliness! We drove back to Alamo and I got my toes and nails done where the ladies finally removed that horrendous yellow nail polish...that was definitely a bad choice. Now I have a wonderfully cheerful red with flavors of orange and pink (as suggested by Cosmo) on my fingers and a more sparkly version on my toes. I also learned it is now trendy to mix and match similar hues on fingers vs toes or left vs right.

Yesterday, Grandma and Grandpa came over to check on me. It was really great to see them and catch up...AND they spotted some neighborhood entrepreneurs selling cookies and lemonade for a 25 cent package deal! Luckily the girls started going door to door to advertise and mom, being the savvy buyer, convinced the girls to walk the order to our door for a very nice tip. We then found out why the deal was so great, the cookies were mini s'morish cookies (nilla wafers, marshmallow, and one chocolate chip). It was genius, a tiny little cookie and one chocolate chip with my lemonade. Anyway, Gma & Gpa were full of "you look greats" and "just keep it ups" and just great encouragement and well wishes. Can't wait to visit you now to hear it all again! But really, it is very nice to have one thing a day to look forward to and help build up doing normal things again, so thank you for that visit!

Today's Dad's Birthday....Hot August Nights? I think, yes

My First Real Outing: 1 wk anniversary

Today, Tuesday, I went on an outing with Teresa and Cousin Annie to Chipotle in Walnut Creek. I must say, I chatted and ate like a pro with a sling on my arm. I'm ready to wash my hair again, which means...time to head to Cuts For All because there is no way I'm trying to do that again in the shower without getting my shoulder wet...no way.

Yesterday was sports day. I rode the bike for 25 minutes at approx. 20 rpms haha. I think i would've been faster walking. Dad and I have been watching Giants games, catching up on the Posey streak and Torres' runs.

Oh also checked up on the rehab place I'll be going to by Stanford, looks awesome! But don't get to go there for another few weeks....brutal....

Thanks to everyone sending well wishes!
Keep up with Team USA as they head to Australia and New Zealand for World Cup

Revelation

After days of feeling trapped by my ice machine shoulder thing....I think I've come to a realization....

We're not supposed to leave it hooked in all the time!

I was using it like a constant ice flow, but as I've tried to walk off many times still hooked in, I was beginning to think that may not really be the case. (Especially considering it was never really that cold with this strategy.)

So today after I dropped the cooler for the 3rd time, I have now decided to use the cooler like a gas station, only filling up when I need it.

Thursday Appointment

Mom and I went back to the hospital and met with Dr. Safran. He was super excited to show us all the "beautiful" pictures from the surgery, which don't look like much.
All I can see is
smooth & white = good
frayed & foggy = bad
The flap part looked especially bad and its pretty obvious which are/WERE the injured parts, once they were pointed out.

I got my dressings removed to find 3 holes in me tied up with little blue sutures. Everything looks good apparently, but I think its very odd to see cord coming out of my skin and sharpie marks all over my shoulder. This also means, its much easier to ice, move around and do my motion exercises.

Still not eating much, but hopefully my appetite will start picking up soon...and no showers yet!

So for now, I'm resting and enjoying myself watching The Colony, a cool experiment where 10 people from different fields are placed in an end of the world situation. These builders and engineers are so smart and creative...

Looking Good

What did they find in there?

Originally, I believe, my diagnosis was a Type I SLAP (superior labral anterior-posterior) tear in my right shoulder, which is a a tear in the labrum.

I'll find out more detailed info and maybe see some pics on Thursday at my follow-up, but this is the information mom can remember from what Dr. Safran told her after he dug in.

My SLAP tear was actually maybe a Type III with a flap on the tear. So basically there was an extra piece of something floating around between the bones and stuff. He also repaired some small rotator cuff issues.

Sorry, not very detailed, but I should know more soon and for those of you more medically inclined...feel free to send me an email if you're curious or have good questions for me to ask on Thursday.

July 20, 2010 Surgery Day

Mom and I woke up and drove to Redwood City to the Stanford Outpatient Hospital. We made it right at 10:15 despite a couple close traffic encounters and right away the ice bucket-machine-thing lady greeted us. She explained all the directions, but we still had issues figuring out the correct technique when we got home that night.

I was then taken back into waiting room #1 where I received some beautiful thigh-high compression stockings that I got to take home! I also got some walk-around socks, but some point during the surgery they stole my left one to put some strange device on my toe…. I’m bummed. That was a great slipper-sock.

While mom went to grab a coffee, I was in the fancy waiting room with my personal TV as the nurses asked me 100 questions. I think really want to send me gifts…they asked my birthday at least 5 times. JT and mom walked in after I had been in there 45 min or so…time to me during this day doesn’t mean much, it was all very confusing, short, long, in an instant….That was great to have some company in there to distract me and keep me from my nerves. This time, I was ready for surgery; excited and ready to get it over with, but it certainly helps to have supporters sitting in there, commenting on the pretty X-ray nurse kilts.

Dr. Safran was about 1 hr behind so I waited till about 1:30 when he came out, gave a little pre-op spiel, and marked my right shoulder, “yes – Safran.”

Mr. Toad’s Wild Ride

Once I had peed twice in the waiting area, it was finally time to wheel me back. I don’t know if I was given some fun drugs before this or I was just really tired, but that cart ride to my surgery room was like Disney ride…I had my hands up and everything, but as soon as they opened the double doors, the atmosphere changed from hotel to hospital. And a couple turns later I was in my operating room. I definitely felt a bit tipsy in that room, but I didn’t have long to think about it or look around because within 2 minutes I was being instructed to breathe deeply and then ----- darkness.

Apparently the nurses woke me up after the surgery in the operating room, but no recollection of that. About 15 minutes afterward carted me into the recovery room I regained consciousness and I was pretty aware of events after that. This was about 3:20 so I was in the OR for about an hour and a half and then didn’t end up leaving the hospital until 6. This is another weird timing issue, I didn’t feel like I was in there a long time, I only watched 1.5 tv shows…what was I doing the rest of the time? Drugs in the IV? Talking to mom? Eating 2 graham crackers? Couldn’t even text till mom got in, the nurses didn’t want me “drunk” texting…for good reason, looking back at what I was typing.

Anyway, then I was wheel-chaired to the car and silently rode home in the Lexus…good car choice; I was a little sensitive to movement. And once we made it home, time for my first round of pain killers…then bedtime, waking up every few hrs for more drugs. Thanks Teresa for sleeping next to me to make sure I didn’t trip every time I got up! Mom and dad were good nurses too, although there were some disputes about proper ice-tank usage.