So we're 3 weeks in and its been up and down. At the beginning of this week I was feeling really optimistic because my shoulder was feeling very relaxed. In general, I was having less episodes of pain and my little stretching exercises actually didn't even hurt at all. That was pretty incredible.
But as the week progressed, I realized it wasn't as fabulous as I had thought. I guess it will continue to be a fluctuation throughout this entire process. I am very happy that I experienced the greatness of no pain at the beginning of the week. Its good to remember that it can be that way and is a good reminder that hopefully it will be like that always in the future.
World Cup Games start tomorrow. If anyone finds the games streaming online...let me know!
Sunday, August 15, 2010
Friday, August 13, 2010
Scary Dreams
I woke up this morning confused. For the second time I had a dream that really felt real, yet I was doing things I knew I couldn't be doing.
I can't remember the first dream which happened last week, but it was a similar story line to the one I'm about to tell you.
I was with the team (a mix of Stanford and USA) and we were playing in a multi-day, 1 game/day tournament. Every morning we'd go to the practice pool to warm-up, but it was more like my rec swim days at Del Amigo; no goals, skinny lanes, no gutters, and lots of waves. I knew that I was injured so I couldn't play in the games, but I was still getting in and warming up...SWIMMING. (Or trying to at least) One of these morning swims we had to warm-up about 2 hrs before the game started....not sure how this happened, must have been bad scheduling. Anyway, on this day we had to be fast because the game was soon, but I could not get my suit on! Everyone else was in the pool and I just could not get ready in time. So disheartening. Finally I dove in as my teammates were getting out.
Change scene: Adam pulls me over to give me the swim set I should do during the game since I can't play....that's when I get really nervous. It is just NOW that I realize I can't swim, I'm not allowed to swim yet even though I've been getting in the pool all week! ahhhh! So Adam is confused, I'm angry and scared that I ruined my shoulder forever, and then I realize its a dream and wake up.
In the dream I remember saying or thinking, "this is why they tell me I can't get in the pool...its because they know I'll accidentally start doing something I'm not supposed to."
Such dream wisdom.
I can't remember the first dream which happened last week, but it was a similar story line to the one I'm about to tell you.
I was with the team (a mix of Stanford and USA) and we were playing in a multi-day, 1 game/day tournament. Every morning we'd go to the practice pool to warm-up, but it was more like my rec swim days at Del Amigo; no goals, skinny lanes, no gutters, and lots of waves. I knew that I was injured so I couldn't play in the games, but I was still getting in and warming up...SWIMMING. (Or trying to at least) One of these morning swims we had to warm-up about 2 hrs before the game started....not sure how this happened, must have been bad scheduling. Anyway, on this day we had to be fast because the game was soon, but I could not get my suit on! Everyone else was in the pool and I just could not get ready in time. So disheartening. Finally I dove in as my teammates were getting out.
Change scene: Adam pulls me over to give me the swim set I should do during the game since I can't play....that's when I get really nervous. It is just NOW that I realize I can't swim, I'm not allowed to swim yet even though I've been getting in the pool all week! ahhhh! So Adam is confused, I'm angry and scared that I ruined my shoulder forever, and then I realize its a dream and wake up.
In the dream I remember saying or thinking, "this is why they tell me I can't get in the pool...its because they know I'll accidentally start doing something I'm not supposed to."
Such dream wisdom.
Monday, August 2, 2010
2 week appt
Updates:
Sleeping on or slightly on my left side....awesome!
Don't have to ice as much as I was....convenient!
Stitches out....freedom!
and...dun dun na naaaaaaaaa
I can SHOWWWAAAAAAAAA
Stood under the rain shower for a super long time and cleansed and cleansed. Hopefully this rash thing on my arm is officially gone!
Sleeping on or slightly on my left side....awesome!
Don't have to ice as much as I was....convenient!
Stitches out....freedom!
and...dun dun na naaaaaaaaa
I can SHOWWWAAAAAAAAA
Stood under the rain shower for a super long time and cleansed and cleansed. Hopefully this rash thing on my arm is officially gone!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Driving towards Reality
The last few days have been pretty big for me. We learned that once again my car needed a checkup so I drove mom's car (can't do the manual quite yet) to the shop! It was weird, but i focused and drove really slow and made it there. The car is a bummer, but hopefully this time they will really clean it up and fix the lingering problem.
The next step was cleanliness! We drove back to Alamo and I got my toes and nails done where the ladies finally removed that horrendous yellow nail polish...that was definitely a bad choice. Now I have a wonderfully cheerful red with flavors of orange and pink (as suggested by Cosmo) on my fingers and a more sparkly version on my toes. I also learned it is now trendy to mix and match similar hues on fingers vs toes or left vs right.
Yesterday, Grandma and Grandpa came over to check on me. It was really great to see them and catch up...AND they spotted some neighborhood entrepreneurs selling cookies and lemonade for a 25 cent package deal! Luckily the girls started going door to door to advertise and mom, being the savvy buyer, convinced the girls to walk the order to our door for a very nice tip. We then found out why the deal was so great, the cookies were mini s'morish cookies (nilla wafers, marshmallow, and one chocolate chip). It was genius, a tiny little cookie and one chocolate chip with my lemonade. Anyway, Gma & Gpa were full of "you look greats" and "just keep it ups" and just great encouragement and well wishes. Can't wait to visit you now to hear it all again! But really, it is very nice to have one thing a day to look forward to and help build up doing normal things again, so thank you for that visit!
Today's Dad's Birthday....Hot August Nights? I think, yes
The next step was cleanliness! We drove back to Alamo and I got my toes and nails done where the ladies finally removed that horrendous yellow nail polish...that was definitely a bad choice. Now I have a wonderfully cheerful red with flavors of orange and pink (as suggested by Cosmo) on my fingers and a more sparkly version on my toes. I also learned it is now trendy to mix and match similar hues on fingers vs toes or left vs right.
Yesterday, Grandma and Grandpa came over to check on me. It was really great to see them and catch up...AND they spotted some neighborhood entrepreneurs selling cookies and lemonade for a 25 cent package deal! Luckily the girls started going door to door to advertise and mom, being the savvy buyer, convinced the girls to walk the order to our door for a very nice tip. We then found out why the deal was so great, the cookies were mini s'morish cookies (nilla wafers, marshmallow, and one chocolate chip). It was genius, a tiny little cookie and one chocolate chip with my lemonade. Anyway, Gma & Gpa were full of "you look greats" and "just keep it ups" and just great encouragement and well wishes. Can't wait to visit you now to hear it all again! But really, it is very nice to have one thing a day to look forward to and help build up doing normal things again, so thank you for that visit!
Today's Dad's Birthday....Hot August Nights? I think, yes
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
My First Real Outing: 1 wk anniversary
Today, Tuesday, I went on an outing with Teresa and Cousin Annie to Chipotle in Walnut Creek. I must say, I chatted and ate like a pro with a sling on my arm. I'm ready to wash my hair again, which means...time to head to Cuts For All because there is no way I'm trying to do that again in the shower without getting my shoulder wet...no way.
Yesterday was sports day. I rode the bike for 25 minutes at approx. 20 rpms haha. I think i would've been faster walking. Dad and I have been watching Giants games, catching up on the Posey streak and Torres' runs.
Oh also checked up on the rehab place I'll be going to by Stanford, looks awesome! But don't get to go there for another few weeks....brutal....
Thanks to everyone sending well wishes!
Keep up with Team USA as they head to Australia and New Zealand for World Cup
Yesterday was sports day. I rode the bike for 25 minutes at approx. 20 rpms haha. I think i would've been faster walking. Dad and I have been watching Giants games, catching up on the Posey streak and Torres' runs.
Oh also checked up on the rehab place I'll be going to by Stanford, looks awesome! But don't get to go there for another few weeks....brutal....
Thanks to everyone sending well wishes!
Keep up with Team USA as they head to Australia and New Zealand for World Cup
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Revelation
After days of feeling trapped by my ice machine shoulder thing....I think I've come to a realization....
We're not supposed to leave it hooked in all the time!
I was using it like a constant ice flow, but as I've tried to walk off many times still hooked in, I was beginning to think that may not really be the case. (Especially considering it was never really that cold with this strategy.)
So today after I dropped the cooler for the 3rd time, I have now decided to use the cooler like a gas station, only filling up when I need it.
We're not supposed to leave it hooked in all the time!
I was using it like a constant ice flow, but as I've tried to walk off many times still hooked in, I was beginning to think that may not really be the case. (Especially considering it was never really that cold with this strategy.)
So today after I dropped the cooler for the 3rd time, I have now decided to use the cooler like a gas station, only filling up when I need it.
Friday, July 23, 2010
Thursday Appointment
Mom and I went back to the hospital and met with Dr. Safran. He was super excited to show us all the "beautiful" pictures from the surgery, which don't look like much.
All I can see is
smooth & white = good
frayed & foggy = bad
The flap part looked especially bad and its pretty obvious which are/WERE the injured parts, once they were pointed out.
I got my dressings removed to find 3 holes in me tied up with little blue sutures. Everything looks good apparently, but I think its very odd to see cord coming out of my skin and sharpie marks all over my shoulder. This also means, its much easier to ice, move around and do my motion exercises.
Still not eating much, but hopefully my appetite will start picking up soon...and no showers yet!
So for now, I'm resting and enjoying myself watching The Colony, a cool experiment where 10 people from different fields are placed in an end of the world situation. These builders and engineers are so smart and creative...
All I can see is
smooth & white = good
frayed & foggy = bad
The flap part looked especially bad and its pretty obvious which are/WERE the injured parts, once they were pointed out.
I got my dressings removed to find 3 holes in me tied up with little blue sutures. Everything looks good apparently, but I think its very odd to see cord coming out of my skin and sharpie marks all over my shoulder. This also means, its much easier to ice, move around and do my motion exercises.
Still not eating much, but hopefully my appetite will start picking up soon...and no showers yet!
So for now, I'm resting and enjoying myself watching The Colony, a cool experiment where 10 people from different fields are placed in an end of the world situation. These builders and engineers are so smart and creative...
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